Howie’s Travel Tips – Customs

One of the challenges about being a large bear is trying to get through customs. You see all of the equipment is designed for luggage being scanned and people going through rotating machines that do body scans. No one ever thought about a bear as large as me when they designed airports. Now, you would think there would have been enough bears in the world for someone to stop and think about the possibility of a very larger bear trying to get through customs. But no, it seems that thought went off into a teacup of somewhere.

Here’s a few notes I’ve made when travelling.

  1. Smile – it usually helps even if the customs people are not smiling.
  2. Avoid tracking devices being inserted someone upon oneself because they can trigger alarms.
  3. Avoid honey or other podgy foods for at least one week before setting off as it could help to reduce the waist.
  4. Avoid stressed out passengers who are running late because they can be very disruptive.
  5. If possible, phone or email ahead to let customs know there’s a large bear on its way.
  6. Declare claustrophobic reactions to being put in the cargo hold – obtain a doctor’s certificate if possible.
  7. Have passport ready but do not smile in the photo because they do not like that.
  8. Be patient – it can take while for customs to figure out what to do with a large bear.
  9. Have a snack handy while waiting.
  10. Hold someone’s hand (or paw) – it usually makes everyone feel better.

If you haven’t read about My Big Adventure, you can read all about it in Every Bear Has Stories.

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